I know that I will sometimes fall into the trap – and I’m quite certain that others do the same – of getting caught up in a mood or situation and thinking that you’re all alone. No one else has ever been in the position. No one else has ever grappled with these thoughts or can relate so I’m going to stew in my own juices and be maudlin.
Well I’ve come to the conclusion that no one is that special! Other people have been in your situation, other people have grappled with you same issues and it’s actually a bit of a relief! It’s good to know that you’re not alone. It’s comforting to know that there are like-minded people in this world and others have had your same struggles and come out the other side only a little worse for the wear.
More than anything else, this blog has taught me this. I’ve lost track of how many times a post will talk about thoughts I’m struggling with, or a situation I’m in where I really feel a bit like I am on an island all by myself. Inevitably it’s those posts that I get feedback like, “Yes! I’ve been struggling with that too!” or “How true! I’ve been dealing with that a lot lately.”
At first I didn’t know how to react to this. After all, their emphatic feedback proclaimed loud and clear that I was not alone in my thoughts and feelings. They did not make me special . . . and that’s what we all strive for right? We want to feel special, that there is something about us that makes us stand out from the crowd.
Then it occurred to me, sometimes you’re just not that special, and in instances where you are struggling or feeling alone, it’s a really good thing that you aren’t special in that. Sometimes it’s nice to know that you are part of the crowd; that you fit in. Because as much as we want to be special, don’t we also strive to find a place where we fit in? Maybe the trick is finding a balance between the two. Fit in when we are weak, and shine when we are strong.