I have officially entered the self-sabotage phase of my creative process. It happens every time, and no matter how much I try to avoid it, or bypass it, I never succeed. Every project I work on, I will inevitably try my damnedest to derail all of my efforts. Even when I am aware that I am doing it, it’s really hard for me to stop.
I’ve been working nonstop for the past couple of months on new project, and it has been smooth sailing, not a road block in sight. Until last week when it occurred to me that this project is just a couple of steps away from transitioning from hypothetical to real-life. Cue self-sabotage in 5 . . . 4 . . . 3 . . . 2 . . . 1 . . .
Since I had that realization I haven’t even looked at my project, much less worked on it. Worse yet, I’ve been ignoring everything else too. Therefore everything is piling up around me, so when I do think about working the voice in my head so helpfully pops up to remind me that I still need to do my dishes, and vacuum, and the laundry, and balance my checkbook, and didn’t I want to plan a huge completely unrelated event that will take large amounts of time and effort? Then, instead of doing any of that, I wind up getting stressed out, plopping down on my couch and marathoning something on Netflix. I have seen more TV shows this way. It’s ridiculous!
So now I am in the spot of trying to break free from this procrastination-frozen-on-the-couch state and get back to getting things done. I’ve started by writing a blog post. Cross that off my to-do list and mark one up for actually getting something done today. Whoo! Now for something else simple . . . reorganize my to-do list . . . okay, that’s not actually on my list, but it’ll make me happy, so that next. After that, I’m gonna get ambitious and work on my website. Here we go!
