It is a very recent development that I claim the title of writer. Despite the fact that it has always been something that I did, I never really identified with it as part of who I was. However, when I stumble upon things like the one I am about to share, it makes me shake my head that I didn’t figure out that writing really is a deeply ingrained part of who I am. So for your father’s day enjoyment I present an oldie – judging from the handwriting I’m going to guess that this was presented to my father when I was about ten. I do hope you will forgive the liberties that ten-year-old me took with the rhyming scheme, 31-year-old me resisted the urge to edit.
Twas the Night Before Father’s Day
Twas the night before father’s day and all through the world
The mothers were stirring cause the baby just hurled.
The children weren’t nestled all snug in their beds
Cause my sister just kicked me square in the head
Mom was in her curlers and pop in his cap
Finally settled us down before I kicked her right back
Revenge isn’t sweet said pop with a sigh
That wasn’t very nice to kick her in the eye
When out in the den there arose such a clatter
Pop sprang from the room to see what was the matter.
When what with his wondering eyes did he see?
But a miniature pond cause I broke the window accidentally.
The rain was pouring in so lively and free
Dad knew in a moment new carpeting it would be.
He was fuming and red from his head to his toe
But calmed down again cause he knew I felt low.
And then in the attic we heard with a beat
The prancing and pawing of little bird’s feet
Faster than bullets towards us they came
Their leader whistled and shouted and called them by name
Come on Ollie, now Stanley, now Larry and Moe,
On Wally, on Beaver, on Shemp and Groucho.
They shouted as they fled off into the night
Happy father’s day to all, and the kids won’t even fight!