Live and Learn

Thursday September 17, 2015Live and LearnLeave a comment

I am convinced that there are two types of people in this world. Those who thrive living in small towns, and those who go bat-shit crazy. Now I’m not talking a small suburb of a major city. I’m talking out in the boonies, you only have mom and pop shops and you probably live on a dirt road, small. This is where I grew up. Technically speaking, Grand Lake isn’t even a town, it’s too small. Its correct categorization is village, and while we’re getting technical, I didn’t live in the village itself. Technically speaking, I grew up in the suburb of a village. It was tiny, and believe it or not, this was bigger than the place that we had moved from. My parents were clearly in the category of thriving in a small town environment. I, on the other hand, firmly fall into the latter category. There is a reason that I now live in the second biggest city in the US and love it!

However, despite driving me absolutely nutters, there are a few things that I learned from that upbringing that I do not find amongst my friends who grew up in cities. Namely my tendency to try to fix everything at least twice before I will give in and throw it away. My roommate is from Orange County in California. She does not do this. In fact she generally looks at me in awe whenever I fix something and calls me MacGyver. She has learned to always check with me first before throwing something away to see if I want to try to fix it. She has also learned to wait until I get home before calling our property manager as I know how to do things like unclog a toilet or take the u-bend off a sink to retrieve an earring.

I have always taken all of these things for granted. After all, where I grew up, if something broke the options were generally fix it yourself or go with out for at least a week. There was no such thing as a 24-hour plumber. I’m pretty sure that the only thing in the county – notice, county, not town or village, in the entire damn county – that stayed open 24-7 was the emergency room – notice the emergency room, there was only one – and the 911 operators. Any service-type company closed at 5 or 6, and everything else at 9. So if your pilot light went out, or your toilet clogged or overflowed, you better know how to fix that yourself! If your coffee maker broke, you tried to figure out and fix whatever was wrong, because to replace that entailed a four hour round trip to Denver or three hour round trip to Silverthorne. Now I love me some coffee, but even I would wait until the weekend to go get my replacement!

Therefore, you learn to fix things. You learn to improvise with whatever you have on hand. Hence the nickname MacGyver. One time at work – where I met my roommate – I fixed the front door with a ball point pen and a paperclip. Everybody else had resigned themselves to waiting until the owner finally got around to calling the handyman in. I thought that was ridiculous, so I fixed it. Growing up in such a small community, I never realized how much I had learned to be self-sufficient until I moved to a big city. Even with things that I can’t fix, my first thought is never to call a professional. It’s always, “Who do I know that would know how to fix that?” Again, growing up in small town that was how things worked. You knew what everybody was good at, and you called upon them when they were needed.

The best part was that this was perfectly acceptable. You helped out when needed, and you knew that others would help out when you needed. I am still in contact with several of my friends from my youth, and even today when something breaks, or there’s a dilemma, we’ll brainstorm to figure out who knows how to fix it. So despite the fact that I will never live in a small town EVER again if I can help it, I do appreciate what it taught me. So does my bank account, as so far this week I have fixed a stand fan, a K-cup coffee machine and tonight I’m working on my swamp cooler. That one I might need some help for, we’ll see.

Tuesday September 01, 2015Live and LearnLeave a comment

My last roommate was a huge fan of the Food Network channel, and as such, I watched a good bit myself. In the end, I wound up falling in love with the show Chopped. For those not familiar, it’s a competition cooking show with four professional chefs competing. They have to make an appetizer in 20 minutes, then a main course in 30 minutes, and then a dessert in 30 minutes. However, after each course, the dishes are judged, by three other chefs, and a competitor is “chopped” or removed from the competition. So by the time you hit the dessert round it’s between two people. Now here’s the catch. Each round contains a mystery basket that contains 4 ingredients that must be incorporated into the dish. Sometimes they’re perfectly normal ingredients like rack of lamb or red wine. Other times they’re fun things like fruit cocktail or Cheetos. Half the fun is watching the look of horror on the chefs’ faces when they pull out the mystery basket ingredients. It’s good times.

Because of this show, I now play Chopped in my kitchen on occasion. Not with a mystery basket per se, but when I really need to go grocery shopping and have nothing left but random ingredients in my kitchen, I’ll pick out 4 and see what I can come up with. I usually wind up with something that’s not great, but it’s okay. The fact that I didn’t have to leave my house to go grocery shopping makes it even better. Occasionally I will come up with pure gold and the new dish enters my normal cooking rotation. But every now and then I create something that isn’t quite god-awful, but pretty close.

Whenever this happens I am then faced with an existential dilemma. On the one hand, I kind of prefer my food to taste good. Strange, I know. On the other hand, I really don’t like wasting food and I’m also not made of money. Therefore, do I toss the crap food and buy something to replace it, or do I suck it up, eat it and vow to never put those foods together ever again? Sad to say, the “not made of money” part of the equation gets the biggest vote, which is why I spent all of last week eating a very strange concoction.

Needless to say, I am all sorts of excited to go grocery shopping and have dinners that actually taste good this week. One of these days I will learn to go grocery shopping before I run out of food. Some day. Oh, FYI – rice pasta is NOT interchangeable with rice.

Thursday August 20, 2015Live and Learn, WritingLeave a comment

I was asked by a fledgling writer if I was willing to share some tips on how to be a good writer. She enjoyed the answers, so I figured I would share them with you too.

Make sure you are clear on what you are trying to say. One of the top reasons that a section or chapter will be confusing is because you, the author, still aren’t sure of the point you’re trying to make. Until you figure that out, no amount of rewriting will make the copy clear.

When someone gives you feedback on a piece, don’t try to defend your words or your intentions. Stay open and ask questions to understand why they feel the way they do. Their interpretation of your work may open your eyes to something that you were unaware of, and in the end make your piece better. However, if you become immediately defensive you won’t be receptive to what they have to say, and chances are they’ll be less willing to read and comment on your pieces in the future.

Short of an editor or a publisher saying that you have to make a change before they will publish, remember that making changes based off of feedback is optional. Not everyone is going to like your work. Spend the majority of your time on the consensus feedback, but always look at the lone wolf feedback. Sometimes the lone wolves have the best insight, but not always. Trust your gut.

KISS – Keep it Simple Stupid! Big words are not always better. I am a huge fan of the thesaurus, but if you have never heard of the word it’s giving you, and after reading the definition you can’t use that word in several sentences, YOU HAVE NO BUSINESS USING THAT WORD! The odds of you using it incorrectly are astronomical and then instead of looking clever, you’ll look like an amateur.Thank of a thesaurus as a giver of suggestions, not answers. In the right hands a thesaurus is a powerful tool. In the wrong hands, it is a harbinger of doom. DOOM! Okay, not really, that’s being overly dramatic. Let’s just say that it won’t work out well for you.

If you consider yourself a writer or if you want to be a writer, then learning new words on a regular, if not daily, basis should be at the top of every to-do list you make. Words are the building blocks of your craft. The more you know, and the more intimately you know them, the better off you will be. Are they Latin or Germanic based? Is the archaic meaning different from their modern meaning? How many meanings does it have? With some words the answer may surprise you. It is an odd day for me if I haven’t consulted a dictionary, thesaurus, or both at least once. Do I use all of the oddball words that I know? Nope. Although I have a goal to work ‘defenestrate’ into a piece.

Another item for your to-do list: read! Writer’s read other writer’s work. At the very least you should be reading examples of your genre. Ideally, you should also be reading works that are far away from your genre. How do the different writers approach story telling? What are tenets that span genres, versus genre specific tenets? Which storytelling methods do you like, which do you hate? Why? What tricks can you use in your own writing? What pitfalls do you want to avoid at all costs.

Pick your battles – If you try to do 7-10 rewrites on everything you put out into this world, you will lose your mind. Or at the very least have low productivity. Know which pieces are your bread and butter and which are your throw-a-ways. Work the hell out of the bread and butter, give the throw-a-ways a once over and move on.

The only way to be a good writer is to write as much as humanly possible. Daily if you can swing it, and some of that writing needs to be put out for public consumption. Listen to your feedback, then write some more. Write. Write. Write.

Tuesday August 18, 2015Life, Live and LearnLeave a comment

In general, I tend to be an articulate person, both while speaking and in writing. The word eloquent will sometimes get bandied about. In times when most people get tongue-tied – pissed off, sad, really any high-emotion situation – I find that my words flow more smoothly. That’s why I never lost a debate in high school, and quite frankly why I don’t normally lose arguments either. If all else fails, I’ll simply out talk the competition. That being said, I find myself at a loss, and have been for the past week and a half.

One of my best friends turned 40 on the 8^th, and another friend decided that it would be a great idea to do a surprise time capsule for her. Basically, a present for every year that she’s been alive, provided by a different person that has been a part of her life. Cool idea, not exactly easy to execute. Long story short, I wound up taking over making this happen even though it wasn’t my idea. More emails then I can count and 20+ packages arriving at my door later, it was her birthday and we had every year represented by a different person. Phew!

I expected a “Thank you!” and some variation of, “How cool!” from the birthday girl. That’s what I had been hearing from all of the people that I corresponded with in the weeks leading up to the party, so I honestly wasn’t expecting anything else. Therefore the effusion of gratitude, love and amazement that I received took me completely off guard. I had sent some emails and wrapped some presents. At no point in the process did I feel put-upon or under-appreciated, so I honestly didn’t feel like I deserved the praise that I got . . . which I mentioned to a couple of people who then proceeded to laugh at me and shake their heads. I’m not entirely sure of the meaning of that, but I’m guessing it’s along the lines of, “You poor clueless person.”

Which doesn’t necessarily help, me being clueless and all. At any rate, I have come a long way from the emotionally stunted youth, to the fairly open and emotive person that I am now. However, I clearly have not spent enough time learning how to take praise. So apparently, if you want me to shut-up, all you have to do is tell me that I’m awesome. So to the people that have encountered me over the past week and a half, please excuse the slightly dazed look I’ve had. I’ve been a bit overwhelmed.

Thursday August 06, 2015Live and LearnLeave a comment

Every so often I catch myself being a hypocrite, and I find that I have to step back for a second and reevaluate. For years, in fact for most of my life, if someone asked me to do something, or asked for a favor, the only reason that I would say no was because I either physically could not do what they asked, or I had already promised that time to someone else. This resulted in me doing things quite often that I had no desire to do. Sometimes big things, something small things, but the common denominator was that I did not want to do it, yet out of guilt or obligation there I was. However, quite often, I resented it, the person or both. I didn’t want to be there and sometimes I was unable to hide the fact that I didn’t want to be there. Therefore, I was miserable and if the task lasted more than an hour or two, I’m sure the people around me were miserable as well.

Then one day, I learned how to say a magic little word – no. It’s amazing how much power that word carries. At first it was like an experiment. Somebody would ask me something – “I need new shoes, do you want to come with me?” Then in my head the following would occur – “Oh God no! You can’t afford new shoes, so going shoe shopping will be like torture. No, no, no!” Despite this tirade in my head, my knee jerk reaction was to say yes, after all they had asked. But instead I would say – “No thanks.” I wouldn’t lie and say that I had other plans, or go into a long drawn out explanation of why I couldn’t. I would simply say no, and low and behold, the world did not end. The Earth kept spinning, my friend went shoe shopping on her own, and all was well. Amazing!

I started to apply this throughout my life. If an invite or a favor or request came along and I truly did not want to do it, I said no thanks. Obviously my ability to do this at work was highly limited, but in my personal life I had free reign. Pretty soon I was saying no right and left and as a result I had more of my time for me. That’s when I learned to value my time and that only giving it away where I wanted to made me happier. True, I was no longer the go-to person for anything and everything, but when I did show up, I was in a good mood, fully present and ready to go. Which really goes back to the old adage of quality is more important than quantity.

At this point in my life, I’ve gotten to the point that I can say no and feel no guilt. I don’t volunteer for things out of peer pressure and I don’t agree to do things that don’t sound fun. Which brings me to the hypocritical part. I find that now, when I hear people complaining that they “have” to do something, or that they got “roped in” to something and that it’s been horrible and awful and such a waste of their time, I have no tolerance for their complaining. None! I don’t want to hear it, because all they had to do was say no. They are in the situation because they put themselves in the situation. Therefore, don’t bitch about it!

Then I step back and remember that I was in their shoes, bitching about things that I “had” to do, not so long ago. And I remember that I had to learn to say no, it wasn’t something that came naturally to me. Perhaps this person has not yet learned the magic of the word no. Therefore, I am going to take the recent rant that I heard with a grain of salt . . . and be thankful that I am no longer wearing those shoes!

Thursday July 23, 2015Change, Live and LearnView all 2 comments

For the majority of my life, I operated under the assumption that I would always feel, to some extent, that I didn’t belong. That there would always be something that was off, that was not quite right. I grew up in a tiny mountain town in Colorado, yet I’m not really the biggest fan of being outdoors. Not to mention that I most definitely do not have a small town mindset. There are some people who do, and they love living in small, rural towns. To a small degree I envy them. There is a certain relaxation and simplicity that comes from a small community. Alas, it’s not for me. I go stir crazy.

I moved to Boulder, CO for college and when I graduated I moved to Denver, because even Boulder wasn’t big enough for me. Despite the drastic change in culture that I was yearning for, I didn’t feel like I belonged in either of these places either. I had friends, made some amazing memories, and generally enjoyed myself. Yet something was always off. I didn’t fit into the party culture at CU – I was a VERY serious 18 year old. I hated winters. The cold, the snow, the ice, the layers of clothing that were necessary. I was always turning down invitations because I didn’t want to go camping, mountain biking, hiking, skiing, etc. Essentially all of the amazing and wonderful things that people move to Colorado for, I had no interest in doing. I didn’t fit in.

Then I moved to LA, and after a couple of rough years of getting on my feet, I find that I LOVE it! The things that people always bitch about LA for – the insane traffic, the higher cost of living, the rude people, the earthquakes, etc. – don’t bother me. I don’t care. Do I still get annoyed from time to time with the traffic, yes? I think you would have to be dead to avoid getting annoyed with the traffic. But oddly enough, it isn’t a huge detractor for me. None of the negatives are, because there are so many positives. I love the anonymity that I have in this city. I can go out and run errands for half the day and never once run into somebody that I know. Or I can meet up with friends and the possibilities of what we can do are endless. I wanna go see a play, there are dozens to choose from every weekend. We want to go out to dinner, pick your poison. You feel like Chinese food and donuts? I know a joint. It’s amazing, and to be honest I still don’t think that my awe at what this city has to offer has waned.

And did I mention no winters? Oh yeah, no snow. At all. Ever. I finally found my city! Yet, I will be talking with friends out here, and some of them have attitudes that are so completely different. They yearn for aspects from wherever they came from, and have trouble calling LA home. It is simply where they live right now. I get the same feeling from them that I had when I lived in Colorado. So I’ve come up with a theory. I believe that there is a place for everyone. Some place on this globe where you feel at home. Where you feel that people get you and your environment nourishes your soul. Some people are lucky enough to be born in that place, while others have to travel around the world to find it. I truly believe this, and when I was chatting with a friend a couple of days ago, I got my first confirmation of this belief. She moved to New Zealand almost a year ago, and when I asked her if she was going to try to renew her Visa, or come back to the States, her answer was immediate and resounding: Stay in New Zealand. She has found her place, and the thought of going anywhere else seems absurd.

I don’t really know how to conduct research on this, science never being a strong subject for me, but I definitely have a hypothesis – there is a place for everyone. Have you found your place? Let me know!

Thursday July 16, 2015Change, Live and Learn, WritingView all 2 comments

Since the beginning of the year, I have been trying to write a motivational book based off of the lives of the women that I study for my Heroines of History biographies. As you can probably guess by the way that I phrased that, I have not made much headway. I have an outline. Most of an outline. It’s been on my To-Do list, don’t get me wrong. It just happens to have been playing hopscotch down my list for months. Instead of actually working on it, I simply move it to another day. I figured I’d get to it later. Then later, turned into later, which turned into later, which turned into, “I am never going to work on this am I?”

That’s when it occurred to me. Maybe the reason that I kept putting off working on it, is because I didn’t actually want to work on it. Maybe part two of my Heroines of History plan (books geared toward juveniles) should have actually been part one. Ah-ha! I don’t want to scrap the motivational book completely, but I don’t want to do it first.

It was also around this time that I was bemoaning the fact that I can’t draw. Well, let’s say that my skill is not good enough to illustrate a children’s book. I have the text for my next book done, but as my illustrator is currently engaged, I can’t move that project forward. Which was making me REALLY frustrated. Not at my illustrator, but at myself. That I was unable to do it on my own and was reliant upon somebody else. I know, *gasp* having to rely on somebody else is the worst thing ever! I bet you can guess which answer I choose on personality tests when they ask if I prefer to work by myself or in a team.

I was seriously working myself up over this. Then, once more, a realization hit. I don’t need to publish two children’s books in the same year. This one can wait until next year. The world will not end and all of my plans will not go up in smoke. 2016 is a lovely publication year for Monsters in the Night. So, that project can be shelved for a bit and I can focus on other things . . . like finishing my novel and working on step two (which is now step one) of my Heroines of History plan.

Amazingly enough, since switching up these priorities I have been a lot more excited about working on my projects. I have gotten more done in the past two weeks with my juvenile Heroines of History books, then I got done with my motivational book all year. I can’t stop thinking about it. I had to take a break from doing the dishes last night so that I could write out some notes. I wish that I had more time to work, and I can so clearly see the path that this project needs to take. I had none of that with the motivational book. In fact, I was trying to figure out how to motivate myself to write the motivational book.

As for my novel, I have rewrites and things to do piled up to my eyeballs, but instead of getting stressed out about it, I’m excited for where it is going, and how close I am to being done. Seriously, so close! I can almost taste it! Once again, I’m excited about my work. Go figure, I started focusing on what I wanted to do and on what I can do instead of what I thought I should do, and what I couldn’t do and things got so much better. I am of course saying all of this, so that in a month and a half when I start freaking out about things that are completely out of my control and I don’t want to see another word about the Civil War, you all can remind me of the way that I feel right now. And then tell me to get back to work.

Tuesday July 07, 2015Inspiration, Live and LearnLeave a comment

Lately I have found myself getting really frustrated by setbacks, or my lack of ability to do certain things. I understand the principles of marketing, but I can’t come up with or implement a successful marketing plan to save my life. I might as well throw my money at a fan and watch it fly away to never be seen again. I can write a thousand words that paint a beautiful picture, but I can’t draw a picture that speaks a thousand words. Which wouldn’t be a big deal, except for the fact that I write children’s books and I can write them one hell of a lot faster than anyone would be able to illustrate them. Which in the grand scheme of things, these are easy to overcome. Hire a marketing team. Hire a couple of illustrators. Easy.

Except for the fact that I can’t afford a marketing team, or a couple of illustrators. So I get frustrated and determined that I’m going to do it myself and wind up wasting a whole lot of time and money . . . because as previously stated, these things are outside of the realm of my abilities. That’s when the trouble comes in. I can’t do it, I can’t pay someone else to do it, so clearly there must be something lacking with me. I am deficient. Which logically makes absolutely no sense. We can’t all be good at everything, so why should it mean that something is wrong with us when we can’t do something? It shouldn’t and it doesn’t mean that. Yet, that is where my brain inevitably goes. Sometimes it goes so far, that my so-called short-comings over shadow the things that I do well . . . which leaves me in a depressed lump sitting on my couch surrounded my projects that need to get finished and no motivation to do anything other than marathon “Murder She Wrote” and play Yahtzee on my iPad. Theoretically speaking, I definitely haven’t actually done that . . . this past weekend . . . I might have played bowling on my iPad too . . .

Eventually I come to my senses – or the internet stops working and I can’t watch “Murder She Wrote” any more – get off my butt and start doing things. It is in the doing that I remember that setbacks are not deficiencies in myself. They are hurdles to be jumped over and left behind. Yes, I’m going to trip on some of them, but I’ll figure out why I tripped so that I won’t trip the next time that hurdle comes up. I used to tell employees that I trained, that I didn’t mind or get upset over questions or over someone not knowing how to do something. I got upset over people asking the same questions or making the same mistakes without ever learning from them. Setbacks are not deficiencies, they are opportunities for learning. Wow, how cornball is that? I feel like I need to make a motivational poster now.

You didn’t expect me to make a real motivational poster did you?

At any rate, that is where my headspace has been lately. Then I had lunch with a friend and lo and behold, she is having the same issue with feeling inadequate over the things that she finds herself unable to do. Crazy! It’s not just me. Once more life provides me with a flashing-neon-lights example of how my problems are not special. They are not unique. People not only know my pain, they feel my pain because they have the same damn pain. I’m starting to feel like emotions are like stories. They’ve all been told a million times, we’re simply slapping new titles on them. That is a good thing though, because it means that whatever issue, whatever problem you are having, somebody, probably thousands of somebodies, have had the same thing and gotten through it. If they can get through it, so can you. There’s comfort in not being alone. So to me, and to everybody else dealing with the same issue – An inability to do one thing, does not make you deficient as a person, or detract from the things that you do well.

Now to say that a million times until I actually believe what I’m saying.

Okay fine, here’s something that’s actually motivational.

Thursday June 25, 2015Live and Learn, WritingLeave a comment

For years I was given the advice that if I wanted to be a writer, I needed to have a blog. For years I had the same reaction – No! I don’t want a blog, I have no idea what I’d write about, I think blogs are dumb, no thank you, not for me. Eventually I was given this advice from enough people, some of which were in my chosen field, that I broke down and started a blog. I think that was threeish years ago, and after all this time, I can confidently respond that my feelings toward blogging are largely the same. HOWEVER, I have also come to realize that blogging is an absolutely invaluable tool, and anybody looking to be a serious writer should really have a blog. Sickening, I know, but here’s why.

#1 – it forces you to sit down and write at least once or twice a week. It doesn’t matter if you are fresh out of ideas or not in the mood, it is Tuesday and Thursday (or whatever days you choose to publish, but they should be the same days every week) and you have to get a blog out. So good, bad or ugly, you get a blog out.

#2 – it forces you to throw your work out into the world for public consumption. I think the number one thing that I hear from writers is that they are afraid to show their work to people. To them I say, how are you ever going to get better, if you never have an outside opinion? The quick answer, is that you can’t, and trust me it is much more painful to get those first glimpses of criticism on a piece that you care deeply about. So get yourself used to the idea of outside opinion on blog posts. They’re quick, they’re relatively painless, and if somebody doesn’t like it, who cares? It was just a blog post. What I think you will actually find though, is that you will find people who like what you’re saying, and you’ll get positive feedback. It’s amazing what a lift I can get to my day when I’m not in the mood, I cobble something together and throw it out there in the world, and then somebody comes back and says they really like the post. Huh. I guess I don’t have to be in the mood to write quality content . . . which leads me to the most important reason . . .

#3 – practice makes perfect. The reason that I can now pump out a blog post that people like, even when I’m not in the mood, is because I’ve practiced. Every post I write, I hone my craft. Every positive comment, or constructive criticism I receive, I hone my craft. I’m honestly kind of afraid to go back and read some of my first blog posts, because I know that the quality will not be the same as what I produce today. Which of course, will make me want to start rewriting and getting them up to snuff, but I won’t. They are the solid proof of how far I have come. My blog is my practice. No through line necessary, no character arcs, just practice.

So if you are a writer, or for that matter, any type of artist, create yourself a practice field that is open to public consumption. If you’re a singer, sing in public at least once or twice a week – record a YouTube video, go to Karaoke or open mic – find an outlet. If you’re an artist, start an art blog. A couple of times a week draw, paint, sculpt, photograph (whatever your medium is) and share it with the public. Don’t make it a piece that is important to you, or one that you spend a lot of time on. It is a piece that you did for practice. Maybe you’re playing with lighting, or a new brush, or a new technique that you saw on the internet. Practice and put it up for people to ooh and aw over. Or people will say nothing at all. You’ll get a lot of that, and it’s something that you need to learn to cope with as an artist. So that’s practice too.

That is my advice, I don’t know why, but I’ve been asked for advice quite a bit lately, so I guess I’m still in the habit. And since I’m on a roll here, I’ve got one more for ya. Deadlines are your friend when it comes to your real work (the work that is important to you, the work that you agonize over). I can’t express enough how much having deadlines has not only improved, but moved my work forward. And really, that’s the biggest thing! It keeps my work moving forward. I can’t put off, or tweak a chapter forever, because there are people to coming over to my house for book club to hear that chapter and they don’t wanna hear that I got caught up marathoning Criminal Minds on Netflix. They don’t wanna hear that I wanted to hang out with my friends. They don’t wanna hear that I couldn’t find my muse and didn’t know what to write. They wanna hear a chapter, and so I produce a chapter. I sacrifice in other parts of my life, and I get chapters written in time for their deadlines.

Okay, maybe don’t do this to yourself.

Are they always great chapters -no. Do some of them get finished right under the wire – absolutely. But they get written. I have really come to discover that hiding behind every excuse I’ve ever given for not getting work done, is fear. Fear that it won’t be any good, fear that people won’t like it, fear that I am not good enough. Sometimes that fear even comes out as hatred or loathing for a project, and you rejoice when the stupid thing is over and you never have to look at it again. Guess what? That’s fear. That deadline pushed you so far out of your comfort zone, you can’t even realize that you’ve accomplished something great, because you’re too busy running back to where it’s safe. To that I say, get over it! Deadlines will help you do so. Your greatest work exists outside of your comfort zone, so let deadlines push you out there. What do you do if at the deadline, what you have is not your best work? Easy, you learn from it so that your next piece will be better. There is no perfect, so we must simply strive to be better than we were yesterday.

So there you have it – put your practice in the public eye, and have hard and fast deadlines. Now go out there and make art.

Thursday May 28, 2015Live and Learn, WritingLeave a comment

I really do love the internet. It lets me stay in touch with people I would have otherwise lost contact with, and more importantly it gives me access to research on any topic under the sun, no matter what time of day. Which comes in incredibly handy when you write historical fiction. I can’t imagine writing this same book twenty years ago. Every time I would come across an unknown – like when was the shell game invented, or what kind of undergarments did men wear during the Civil War – I would have to go to a book to look it up. If I were lucky, I would have the book I needed on hand, but if not I would have to wait until I could get in to a library and hope that they would have a book with the required info. If not, I would have to wait until a book from another library could be requested. Something that takes me thirty seconds to look up today, could have feasibly taken weeks to look up twenty years ago. That boggles the imagination. Yes, there is the total junk that you have to weed through, but the amount of knowledge at your fingertips is fantastic!

However, sometimes I think that too much knowledge can actually be a bad thing. I tend to frequent sites like the Mayo Clinic’s on a fairly regular basis. My friend’s husband was diagnosed with prostate cancer, so I did research on prostate cancer so that she wouldn’t have to explain everything to me every time we spoke. I did the same when my aunt was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, or a friend with diabetes. All of this is good, but whenever I find myself on a site like that looking up stuff about symptoms for myself I find that the answer is one of two things.

I am clearly deficient in something, take a multi-vitamin.
I HAVE A HORRIBLE, NASTY DISEASE AND I AM GOING TO DIE!

There’s really no in between and when your brain is presented with those two options it is obviously going to focus on option #2. Which leads to a good amount of freaking out, until common sense finally kicks in, I take a multi-vitamin and go on with my day. It really makes me wonder though, how many people experience this same phenomena – it can’t just be me – but don’t have common sense to kick in, so they go rushing to the doctor thinking that they’re dying. I can only imagine that doctors and nurses HATE all of those medical sites. Especially the ones that have the symptom checkers. You know, you enter what symptoms you have and it lists all of the horrible diseases that cause those symptoms. Actual trained medical professionals must cringe every time they hear somebody say that they did some research online, and then suggest what they think they have.

“No ma’am, you do not have Parkinson’s Disease. Your fatigue is caused by only getting three hours of sleep a night, the tremors are caused by the twelve cups of coffee you drink during the day to stay awake, and your malnutrition is due to the fact that your diet consists mainly of Cheetos. Get some sleep, lay off the caffeine, eat some real food every now and then, and you’ll be fine. Oh, and please do not procreate.”

I know that this is what happens every time I go onto one of those sites for myself. I have never once been correct about a diagnosis or explanation for symptoms. Yet I keep going back. Which if you think about it, is pretty crazy. They say that knowledge is power. What they don’t say is that sometimes it’s the power to be a well-educated idiot.