In general, I tend to be an articulate person, both while speaking and in writing. The word eloquent will sometimes get bandied about. In times when most people get tongue-tied – pissed off, sad, really any high-emotion situation – I find that my words flow more smoothly. That’s why I never lost a debate in high school, and quite frankly why I don’t normally lose arguments either. If all else fails, I’ll simply out talk the competition. That being said, I find myself at a loss, and have been for the past week and a half.
One of my best friends turned 40 on the 8th, and another friend decided that it would be a great idea to do a surprise time capsule for her. Basically, a present for every year that she’s been alive, provided by a different person that has been a part of her life. Cool idea, not exactly easy to execute. Long story short, I wound up taking over making this happen even though it wasn’t my idea. More emails then I can count and 20+ packages arriving at my door later, it was her birthday and we had every year represented by a different person. Phew!
I expected a “Thank you!” and some variation of, “How cool!” from the birthday girl. That’s what I had been hearing from all of the people that I corresponded with in the weeks leading up to the party, so I honestly wasn’t expecting anything else. Therefore the effusion of gratitude, love and amazement that I received took me completely off guard. I had sent some emails and wrapped some presents. At no point in the process did I feel put-upon or under-appreciated, so I honestly didn’t feel like I deserved the praise that I got . . . which I mentioned to a couple of people who then proceeded to laugh at me and shake their heads. I’m not entirely sure of the meaning of that, but I’m guessing it’s along the lines of, “You poor clueless person.”
Which doesn’t necessarily help, me being clueless and all. At any rate, I have come a long way from the emotionally stunted youth, to the fairly open and emotive person that I am now. However, I clearly have not spent enough time learning how to take praise. So apparently, if you want me to shut-up, all you have to do is tell me that I’m awesome. So to the people that have encountered me over the past week and a half, please excuse the slightly dazed look I’ve had. I’ve been a bit overwhelmed.
