For the majority of my life, I operated under the assumption that I would always feel, to some extent, that I didn’t belong. That there would always be something that was off, that was not quite right. I grew up in a tiny mountain town in Colorado, yet I’m not really the biggest fan of being outdoors. Not to mention that I most definitely do not have a small town mindset. There are some people who do, and they love living in small, rural towns. To a small degree I envy them. There is a certain relaxation and simplicity that comes from a small community. Alas, it’s not for me. I go stir crazy.
I moved to Boulder, CO for college and when I graduated I moved to Denver, because even Boulder wasn’t big enough for me. Despite the drastic change in culture that I was yearning for, I didn’t feel like I belonged in either of these places either. I had friends, made some amazing memories, and generally enjoyed myself. Yet something was always off. I didn’t fit into the party culture at CU – I was a VERY serious 18 year old. I hated winters. The cold, the snow, the ice, the layers of clothing that were necessary. I was always turning down invitations because I didn’t want to go camping, mountain biking, hiking, skiing, etc. Essentially all of the amazing and wonderful things that people move to Colorado for, I had no interest in doing. I didn’t fit in.
Then I moved to LA, and after a couple of rough years of getting on my feet, I find that I LOVE it! The things that people always bitch about LA for – the insane traffic, the higher cost of living, the rude people, the earthquakes, etc. – don’t bother me. I don’t care. Do I still get annoyed from time to time with the traffic, yes? I think you would have to be dead to avoid getting annoyed with the traffic. But oddly enough, it isn’t a huge detractor for me. None of the negatives are, because there are so many positives. I love the anonymity that I have in this city. I can go out and run errands for half the day and never once run into somebody that I know. Or I can meet up with friends and the possibilities of what we can do are endless. I wanna go see a play, there are dozens to choose from every weekend. We want to go out to dinner, pick your poison. You feel like Chinese food and donuts? I know a joint. It’s amazing, and to be honest I still don’t think that my awe at what this city has to offer has waned.
And did I mention no winters? Oh yeah, no snow. At all. Ever. I finally found my city! Yet, I will be talking with friends out here, and some of them have attitudes that are so completely different. They yearn for aspects from wherever they came from, and have trouble calling LA home. It is simply where they live right now. I get the same feeling from them that I had when I lived in Colorado. So I’ve come up with a theory. I believe that there is a place for everyone. Some place on this globe where you feel at home. Where you feel that people get you and your environment nourishes your soul. Some people are lucky enough to be born in that place, while others have to travel around the world to find it. I truly believe this, and when I was chatting with a friend a couple of days ago, I got my first confirmation of this belief. She moved to New Zealand almost a year ago, and when I asked her if she was going to try to renew her Visa, or come back to the States, her answer was immediate and resounding: Stay in New Zealand. She has found her place, and the thought of going anywhere else seems absurd.
I don’t really know how to conduct research on this, science never being a strong subject for me, but I definitely have a hypothesis – there is a place for everyone. Have you found your place? Let me know!