. . . or the innocent things that you do that actually make their life harder. For the past couple of years I have worked in close proximity to someone who is blind. Having grown up with a disabled mother in a wheelchair I am sensitive to the fact that many people with disabilities would prefer to go through life being seen as a person, not as a disability. I want to say all, but as I have not spoken to all and do not deign to speak for them unduly, I will stick with many. I personally  have very strict dietary restrictions, and while I definitely appreciate it when restaurants take note of this and take special care to make sure that my food is prepared correctly, I HATE it when a restaurant makes a huge deal about it. I’ve actually had servers make such a big deal by bringing the manager and chef over that it not only absorbed the attention of my table, but the entire restaurant. Then for the rest of the meal both the server and manager checked back in with me multiple times, stopping the conversation of my table every time they did, at one point even moving a bread basket to the other side of the table so it wasn’t too close. I was no longer a person, I was my allergies. Not cool. I doubt very seriously that this pet peeve is singular to me, and unlike others the only way that people know of my shortcomings is if I tell them. By keeping my mouth shut I can pass as any other person, you know the ones that can go to a buffet without breaking out in a cold sweat because of the possibility of cross contamination.

I don’t know why, but lately this has been at the forefront of my thoughts. So I decided to share some of my observations about people’s innocent, yet ridiculous behaviors around a blind person.

1.      Verbally introducing yourself than taking a step to the right or left. I know that I’ve done this myself. You’re still entering a room and there’s someone behind you, so you introduce yourself and then move aside for the person behind you. This is all fine and dandy unless the person you’re meeting is blind. They have to rely on the sound of your voice to find you, so if you speak and then move they will approach empty space with their hand out to shake yours. Which brings me to . . .
2.      Leaving them hanging when they go to shake your hand but are off by a bit. WTF?!? I have actually seen people get embarrassed by this . . . the person who can see! I don’t get why this is embarrassing. Take their hand and shake it. Trust me when I say it’s not the first time they’ve missed and it won’t be the last. It’s only a big deal if you make it one.
3.      Opening the door for them, but only part way. Unless you enjoy other people’s pain, open the door all the way! They can’t see how far it’s open, so chances are they will walk right into the door instead of the narrow opening that you left for them.
4.      Unless they’ve asked you to, don’t open a jar of lotion or container of food before handing it to them. Let them open it so that they know which end needs to be up. It will save a lot of spills.
5.      Setting things down on the floor or in a walkway and then walking away from it, even if only for a minute. I’ve tripped over unexpected things on the floor and I have full use of my eyes. Murphy’s Law – if you leave something there for a minute, that will be the exact minute that the person will walk down the hall.
6.      Serving them a hot beverage with the handle at an awkward angle to them. Okay, as long as they know it’s there, this one they can figure out without a problem. It’s just nicer to set it up so they don’t have to grope around a scalding hot mug around to get to the handle.
7.      Assuming that they want your help and grabbing on to them to show them the right direction. I will never understand this one. Are you helping them, or taking them hostage? Never assume that they need the help. If they ask for it, let THEM take your arm or shoulder.

8.        Talking louder – unless they’re also partially deaf, this just makes you sound like an idiot.Talking louder doesn’t help anything. Enunciating clearly does since they don’t have the benefit of seeing your lips form the words, but good diction and volume have nothing to do with one another.
9.    Rearranging the furniture – again, unless you really enjoy other people’s pain, don’t rearrange a blind person’s furniture! Even by an inch or two! If it’s a space that they are in a lot, they have the lay out memorized and know exactly how many steps they need to go in which directions to get where ever they need to be. If you absolutely must move some of the furniture, tell them you’re doing it and then put it back exactly where you found it when you’re done. You would think that this is a no-brainer . . . it’s not.
10.    Treating them like a child/feeling sorry for them/babying them because they are blind. I’m guessing that you don’t like it when people do this to you. Being blind is simply part of this person’s reality, and hopefully they have found ways to keep living and functioning like normal. Your pity and condescension are not needed or appreciated. I’ve never actually had a blind person or someone with a disability tell me this, but it’s a personal pet peeve of mine.  I hated it when people would do this to my mother and then turn to me and treat me like an adult. From the look that she would get in her eyes, she hated it too. Again, I’m guessing that this one isn’t singular to me.

Okay, so these really aren’t ways to mess with a blind person, but it did get you to read the post!